A prerequisite to loving your friend as yourself, is to first love yourself. You can’t share that which you don’t have. When a Jew is at peace with himself, through the Faith and Trust he has in Hashem, he can more readily share the tranquility and happiness, that comes from such living with another person. He has no issues, complains little, carries no grudges and pardons his grievances. No one is giving him. No one is taking from him. Whatever happens is per Hashem’s will.
Judging people favorably is a good starting point, in practicing true love for another person. After all, they are only human beings, just like us. Who doesn’t want to be judged favorably? Who doesn’t want to be given the benefit of the doubt?
My father of blessed memory, HoRav Pinchos Singer z”l was such a Jew. He loved and cared about people and always showed it. Giving someone the benefit of the doubt or finding merit in their actions, was second nature.
During the second World War, he ran around collecting large sums of money for Vaad Hatzolah, to save Jews trapped in Nazi territory.
After the war years, he traveled all across the USA and Canada, delivering inspirational speeches. He encouraged Jews to respect Torah learning, thereby motivating them to support the financially struggling Yeshiva Chofetz Chaim.
Throughout his life, he would always try to benefit Jews, wherever he was and whenever possible. It was second nature, part of his essence.
I remember one day walking with him on 13th Avenue, in Boro Park. All of a sudden he started running towards a parking meter that had a red expired sign. He had noticed an officer getting ready to issue a parking ticket. Quickly he put a dime into the meter, before the officer could start writing the ticket. Didn’t understand why he did that, since it wasn’t his car that was being ticketed. So I asked for an explanation. He simply replied, “the car probably belongs to a Yid. Most people living in Boro Park are Jewish. I didn’t want a Yid to get a ticket”.
He was always thinking about how he could help someone else. Its one thing to say I love you. It’s an entirely different thing to show it and do something about it. True love is when we can imagine ourselves being in the other persons predicament and then doing something to alleviate their hardship.
We are taught that if you see your friend’s animal sagging under a load, you are required to lend a hand and help out. Then how much more so, do we need to lend a hand to help out a fellow Jew in trouble.
One of the greatest acheivments one can accomplish in this world, is to help another Jew. When we do that, we are helping one of Hashem’s children. Hashem is deeply in love with the people that help his children out.
Since we are all children of Hashem, we are bound together as brothers and sisters, responsible for each other. If we don’t look after one another and care for each other, who else will? Only through our deep concern and caring, have we been able to navigate the exile and survive. We only have Hashem and each other. Love your fellow man like yourself, to nurture peace and harmony within your family, your community, and your world. Hashem will surely smile down upon you and shower you with His endless gifts.
